5 Changes to Create a Better You

You guys, it has been a minute. More than a minute, it has been weeks, maybe even months since I jumped into your inbox/browser. This fact alone is crazy to me and has had me feeling like a failure on more than one level. I want to talk about some changes with you.

Yet, at the end of the day, I have come to a realization. The reason I have been so quiet is that in 2019, I let the world happen to me. I lost myself, I lost my direction, and I lost my words. I did all these things more times than I would like to admit.

5 Changes to Create a Better You

If you have followed along with my posts throughout 2019, you know this year has not been kind to me and my family. The loss of beloved family members as well as the loss of a baby has turned the world upside down more than once. I have personally experienced depression like I have never known. (Yeah, I said that out loud **gasp**) I let go or buried more pieces of myself than I care to admit, and I have completely ignored other aspects of my life in an attempt to push through the crazy I was experiencing.

Yet at the end of the day, I sit here in awe.

As a mom, I have pushed through so much more than I ever anticipated I would. As a wife, I smiled when I should have cried, and put myself on autopilot. Worst of all, as a person, I cast my goals aside and let my circumstances control my life.

Sound familiar?

Well mama’s, I am here to tell you. While I could sit here all day long and regret the way I handled the hurdles 2019 put in my path, I am instead choosing to refocus, refuel, and remind. Remind myself of who I am and who I want my kids to see me be. I mean, as a mom, that is what it is all about, right?

Therefore, in 2020 you can bet your ass you are about to see a new woman behind the words.

TheCrazyWorkingMom is about to become more focused than ever before because I am allowing myself a few key changes in 2020. While I am not one for resolutions,  I am one for changes and redirection. So get ready mama because I am hoping you will find yourself committing to a few of these as well.

I am choosing me.

For damn near all of 2019 I have been the first to volunteer. If something needed doing, or someone needed a person, I magically found my hand in the air even when I had nothing left to give.

Guys, this constant need to help and fix will leave you mentally exhausted quickly, quickly, and in a hurry.

Therefore, I am putting a stop to a lot of my constant giving in 2020, and instead, reserving some of this energy for myself. Call me greedy, but I cannot be the best me, let alone the best mother to my kids, if I am living in a state of constant exhaustion. So yes, I am coming first.

I am letting go of things that no longer serve me.

Have you ever subscribed to a service (coughs **Direct TV**)  that the price just kept moving up on you, but you remained subscribed because you were comfortable with that service, so why not ride it out for a few more dollars a month?

Now look around at the things you are mentally/spiritually “subscribed” to. I did and what I found was NOT pretty.

I have become comfortable with people, relationships, activities, social gatherings and so much more that are doing nothing more than sucking my energy and time. I am not really benefiting from any of these things, but I have found myself comfortable with them, so the change seems scary.

Guess what though mama, scared or not I am letting them go. This is a process I have very much so already started, and I know it is going to hurt in places. Damn though, it needs to happen and not just for me.

My kids, your kids, and all our next generation need to know that it is ok to not hang on to those things that do not serve you. As parents, we must be strong enough to show them.

I am accepting change and embracing the unknown

Oh, shit mama, I just dropped that magic yet scary word….change.

We are all terrified of it because, well what happens if I change something and it fails? Yes mama, but what happens if you change and it creates the life you have been dreaming of?

This is the reality I have slowly come to accept. Change is scary. The unknown is scary. Put these together and it is downright terrifying, but it will only be that way until you see what opportunities it creates for you.

Do not be afraid to jump in headfirst when change comes knocking and you realize you need it. The fear is only going to be as great as you let it be. Rock it out mama and life is going to rock it out with you.

At least, that’s my plan.

New Changes: I am going to have magic, not mediocrity.

2020 is not just the start of a new year, but it is bringing in the start of a new decade. A decade upon which I fully intend to embrace the magic of life instead of living in the mediocrity of the day-to-day.

I for one have become so comfortable in the day-to-day that I have started to do nothing more than the routine I have created for myself.

Wake up, get my tiny humans to all their designated spaces, retrieve them from said designated spaces, create a nutritious warm meal, bathe tiny humans, attend to household chores, sleep, and do it all again the next day.

Guess what. There is zero magic in a straight, repetitive routine.

Thus, I am about to fully embrace everything that is in this life that has been occurring around me while I have been stuck in my routine. As a matter of fact, this I will have magic, not mediocrity is becoming my 2020 mantra. Mama, the world doesn’t stop being amazing around us, we just choose to stop taking it in.

Ponder that one for a moment.

New Changes: I will not vibe on a level less than my own.

Hear me out.

Once you set a direction, and intention for yourself, you want to start achieving that next level, stepping closer to that goal right now, right?

The problem is, sometimes we find ourselves setting those intentions, creating those vibes within ourselves, and then, we make zero changes in our surroundings.

We stay around the same people, and the same surroundings, and allow ourselves to settle back into that mediocrity.

We fail to surround ourselves with people who vibe on our level, and forgo the changes for the option of comfort.

Well, mama, that is no longer my story, and I hope it will not be yours either.

What if tomorrow, we all started making changes that showed those around us, most importantly our children, that we are willing to do what it takes to create our own happiness? Do what it takes to make our dreams come true? What message does that send to our kids when they see us hustling to achieve our greatest potential instead of settling for a day-to-day that we despise?

Kind of makes you want to dive into the rest of your life right now, doesn’t it?

So, I leave you with this.

2019 kicked my ass.

It left me bent and broken. It left me a completely different person than I was when I wrote this piece last year about the changes I was planning to make this year. However, it also has fueled the fire that drives my passion to do better. To climb those mountains and become the person I envision myself being. Mama, it made me want to be better, do better, and show my kids that better is possible. To make the changes needed to make this possible.

What has it done for you, and what changes will you make in 2020 to do better?